"Update" NYC

You’ve Got Mail

Texts, emails, instant messaging, Facetime, Skype and the list goes on and on as ways that we currently communicate with one another. It used to be that you would rush home to see if your answering machine was blinking a red light to let you know that someone left a message for you. Now, with the many forms of communication that we have access to; I couldn’t help but wonder if it’s helping us express ourselves or making us lazy?

Two Sundays ago, I was back in familiar grounds by spending time with Mr. D. He had taken me to a comedy show near his apartment and the way that he was back in my life wasn’t from a text or an email but rather an actual face to face conversation held in our office elevator. It was like a scene in a movie where I was already in the elevator and as the doors were closing…he appeared. Or rather in this case, the doors were closing on him and he put his arm through to re-open the doors but I like to see the glass as half-full.

After a fun time of reconnecting that evening, the next day he had ask me to send him an email regarding his summer house and to which he replied with, “Last Sunday was fun. Wanna do it again?” Two little sentences that I wasn’t sure had a bigger meaning. I was hesitant to say yes right away given that it was the Superbowl Sunday he was wanting to hangout and I was certain he would’ve had plans already with his friends. I waited a couple of hours for it to all sink in and I responded with, “Sounds good.” Two little words from me that had potential for a bigger meaning.

The rest of the week was spent with us both working feverishly at the office and then on Wednesday, I got a text from him telling me that he had just left a drawing class. A drawing class? Who was this man? In the time that I had known him, a drawing class would be the last thing that I imagined he would be doing with his free time. I told him that he was surprising me with this activity and all he could say was, “I’m still the same silly guy you know.” It was a relief that even through his sobriety that he is still remaining the same person that would do little things to make me laugh. I decided to leave the conversation as is and went to bed.

On Friday, we, once again bumped into each other on the street near our office and that is where he asked me if we could change our plans to meet on Saturday rather than Sunday. I didn’t really have any solid plans on Saturday that I couldn’t shift and I told him that it was fine.  I didn’t see him for the rest of the day and after work; I went home to get ready for happy hour near my apartment.

I met some friends at, Rise Bar, near my apartment and some other friends of mine joined us whom I hadn’t seen in a long time. We toasted their news of engagement and house hunting and after a few drinks; decided that we should go bowling. We all bowled and while I was bowling, I got a text from Mr. D. saying that he really dislikes a coworker of ours for she destroyed his work on a pitch that is happening at the end of this week. From this message, I gathered that he was planting the seed that he would either cancel our plans all together or that they would be altered someway. With all the forms of communication, it’s amazing at how we still can either predict what is going to happen next or end up lost in the dark. After bowling, in which I came in second place, we stopped off at the bar, DBL, for one beer and then onto our last stop of, Ninth Avenue Saloon. There we found seats in the back and proceeded to drink ourselves into a very drunken state. It was there that I decided to tell my friends that I was going to be seeing Mr. D. at some point that weekend. It was also there that my friend (the same friend from the previous weekend who gave me the big speech) gave me my second big speech of what exactly my intentions are with Mr. D. It was drunken talk and not a lot got resolved with the exception of that this is something that I have to do. As we stumbled out of the bar, we said our goodbyes and I got my friend a cab and sent him downtown to meet another set of friends. I walked several blocks home hoping the cold city air would sober me.

The next day I woke up moving rather slow and I had no one to blame but myself. I did laundry and attempted a quick two mile run at the gym but quickly rushed home to shower before meeting my friend for lunch in Chelsea. Over lunch, we updated each other on our lives and it was nice to finally be able to do that face to face rather than emails or this here blog. After lunch, I got home to force myself to take a nap and during my nap, I woke up to a text from Mr. D. and he has definitely learned from my quick temper how to handle things. He had messaged me earlier in the day to tell me that due to the coworker that destroyed his work the previous day, that he is working over the weekend and when he and I can actually meet will determine when he gets done. So, his message to me started with, “Hi there…now don’t get mad but…” He had to move our meeting till Sunday due to work and he was going to be at the office rather late on Saturday. I found it funny that after all this time he knows how much I don’t like it when plans shift. I gave him some words of encouragement and told him that I would be seeing him the next day. At least our communication has improved. He thanked me for understanding and after that; I forced myself to get ready.

That night, I met up with the same friends from the night before. We were all exhausted from our bar hopping and bowling from the previous night yet we went back to, Ninth Avenue Saloon, sat at the bar for two beers and I took my tired ass home.

I woke up yesterday still feeling exhausted but at least I was no longer hungover. I had several errands to run, so I showered, got dressed and did some shopping down in Union Square. While shopping, I began messaging with Mr. D. and he said I can swing by his apartment around 3:30 or 4 that afternoon since I needed to be in Brooklyn to go to my friend’s apartment to watch the game.

Knowing how hard he had been working all weekend long, I decided to stop off at the bodega on his corner and get him a Diet Coke and Peanut M&M’s.  When I arrived he was just getting out of the shower and opened the door and I could instantly tell that he was happy to see me. We hugged and he was happy that I had brought over some snacks for us. As we sat and had our snacks, we talked about our weekends and he didn’t have the television on and I asked him to turn the television on for I needed noise. As he was flipping through the channels, the movie, You’ve Got Mail, was on. He looked at me and said, “I bet this is something you like.” He was right. We sat there and watched the movie. The entire time we looked at each other and either smiled or laughed and during commercial breaks, we would talk or he would do things to make me laugh. I felt like he was extra flirtatious, maybe it was me being there or maybe it was the banter between Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks, either way…I was happy.

After the movie was over with, I needed to now get back to the city since the plans had shifted from watching the game in Brooklyn to back in the city. He was getting his coat and shoes on as I was getting ready to leave his apartment and I told him that I knew where the subway was and he said, “No…I will walk you.” During our walk, he mentioned how I never invite him over to my apartment or even in my neighborhood. He was right because I’ve never offered up my apartment or to even hang out in my area the entire time we’ve known each other. I’m not sure the real reason behind it but I told him that next time, we can certainly hang out in my area. At one point during our walk to the subway, he stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and said, “This feels wrong. We are walking on the wrong side of each other.” I have this very odd thing where I prefer if people walk on my left side and I couldn’t believe that he remembered that. After we switched sides, he said, “There…that feels better.” When we got to the subway station, we hugged and he thanked me for coming over even though it was brief.

I arrived at my friend’s apartment just in time for kick-off and we had snacks, ordered Chinese food and when I was asked what I did with my day; I told them all where I had been prior. My friends had a few questions for me but all in all, I think the news went over without much fanfare. An hour into the game I got a text message from Mr. D. He was asking if I was having a good time with my friends. I told him that I was having a nice time and asked how he was doing. He said he was doing great and his last message to me was, “This afternoon was terrific!” And he was right, the afternoon was terrific. After the game, I went home and realized that with all our forms of communication that what it really boils down to is our delivery in our message. What point do you want to make, the tone and how you want to be represented. It’s unfortunate that we no longer use these three little words to express communication in the digital age but something about saying it takes us back to a simpler time and those words are…”You’ve Got Mail.”

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