"Update" NYC

Chill Out

Retreats, meditation, prayers and even cleanses are all designed to benefit us. This benefit is to tell our minds, souls and bodies that every once in awhile that we all need to chill out. We need to recalibrate our ways of thinking, believing and how we treat others because we live in such a toxic world. There are times that we are so busy in our lives that we forget the little things in life that used to provide such joy in our lives. However, in a world where life can pass us by when will we ever find the time to just chill out?

Last week was a rather stressful work week for me. I was working 12-16 hour days and that was just this past Monday and Tuesday. Our entire team was over worked and we had only just begun the work week, which left us all with zero time to chill out let alone get enough proper rest to do a good job for an upcoming convention.

So, when I woke up on Wednesday, I was over exhausted that my mind decided to go into places that I really didn’t want it to go. Naturally, my mind went to thinking that my office crush was off on dates, ignoring me, etc. etc. All of it was complete and utter non-sense but it led to a bad work day. However, that evening after work, we were having a gathering at the bar, The Archive, for one of my editors. It was a small group but I was there for an hour before my office crush walked in. I didn’t see him at first but then I felt a tap on my shoulder and he said hi. I asked him what he did the night before (in my head he was on a date with some hot model) and when he said that all he did was go to the gym and read, all my fears washed away. When he asked me what I was doing on Thursday night, I told him that I was going to the ballet. All he asked was, “Really? Are you going on a date with someone?” I told him no and that I was going with a friend, which was the truth. He left shortly after he asked me that question and I left an hour later. I went to bed that night with a very chilled state of mind.

On Thursday, I suffered from another intense work day but I told my entire team that I was leaving on time because I needed to rush home and get ready for the ballet. It was my first time ever attending a ballet at the New York City Ballet in Lincoln Center, I felt like Cher in Moonstruck. My friend works for the company and was able to score us excellent seats. I sat in the theatre and looked around at all the well-dressed people that have probably attended a million shows but I didn’t let my insecurities about feeling like an outsider get in the way of me having a wonderful experience. I took in the entire show and even got a little emotional at how beautiful the dancing was. After the show, I went home and was once again allowing myself to enjoy a chilled mental state of mind.

Friday, and the entire city was pouring down with rain. It was cold, gross and overall miserable but for some reason the entire work day was busy yet rather fun. The fun part of the day was that my office crush was in an excellent mood. Throughout the entire work day he kept sending me links to nice houses in the Massachusetts area that he wanted my opinion on. He would say things like, “I know you want a nice bathroom and a washer and dryer. What about his place?” And that kind of talk went on for the entire day. It was fun to play “make believe” when it came to things like that. Than toward the end of the day he asked me to come by his desk. When I did, he got up and said, “Follow me.” I followed him to the other side of the office where he introduced me to our Human Resources department. He told the department that I needed to fix my 401K. My office crush has been on me for weeks to figure out my 401K because I don’t even know if I have one or what I’m contributing to it. Everyone got a good laugh at my expense for being so bad with my finances but it was just another thing that made me think that my office crush has my best interest at heart. Before I left the office that day, we said goodbye and confirmed our plans for this past Sunday.

It was so nice on Saturday to have the apartment to myself. I had one roommate move out last week and my new roommate doesn’t move in till this Wednesday. So, I did something that completely chills me out and that is clean. I cleaned the apartment for over two hours and it felt amazing. Afterwards, I ran a few errands before I needed to get ready for a birthday party that night. I met up with a few friends at, Barrage, before we all picked up another friend of ours before heading to the party that was conveniently located in the area that I live in. No cabs. No subway. No Uber. All I had to do was walk from the party to my apartment. The party was nice and pleasant but after a few drinks, my friends and I went to the bar, Ninth Avenue Saloon, where we had a few more drinks before we all said goodbye around 3 a.m.

Yesterday, I woke up only slightly tired and so I grabbed my coffee, the paper and had a nice chill morning before I was to meet up with my office crush. He asked me to meet him in Union Square around 1:30 because he was buying a new phone. He got his new phone and asked me to meet him at his favorite bar, Professor Thom’s. I was already in the area doing some shopping so I walked over there. He is going on his third week of sobriety and I couldn’t be more proud of him. We got a table and began updating each other on our previous night. He told me that he also attended a birthday party and that it was with some of the same friends of his that I met at his game night two Saturday’s ago. He told me that all his friends asked about me. They asked where I was and how I was doing. It was nice to hear that they remembered me and even asked about me.

After watching some football and lunch, he suggested that we take a walk and enjoy the amazing fall day that the city was having. I agreed and along the walk, I told him that we should walk on Fifth Avenue and maybe grab some new clothes for him because I was tired of seeing him where the same damn khaki pants at the office. He laughed and said, “I’m surprised you didn’t say something earlier.” We were in the store and I helped him pick out a pair of pants and two new shirts. After the shopping, he said, “When are you ever going to let me see your apartment?” I told him that when it’s ready after the new roommate moves in than I will let him see my apartment. After all these months, he hasn’t even come close the area that I live in and I think it’s time. It was still such a nice day, that he said he would walk with me uptown for a little bit. It was totally out of his way to go back to Brooklyn but instead we walked from Union Square all the way to the Hell’s Kitchen area. The entire walk, we laughed and shared stories from our childhood. When we reached 57th Street, it was there that he hugged me and got on the subway going back to his apartment in Brooklyn. A few hours later, I sent him a text thanking him for a nice day and he responded back with, “Today was awesome!” The rest of the evening, I relished in magazines, hot chocolate and a facial mask.

Today, he made sure to let me see his new pants and new shirt that he was wearing. All I could tell him was that he looked handsome. He smiled and thanked me. It was the perfect way to start the week.

I can freely admit that I’m neurotic and can over analyze anything or anyone that comes my way. But what I learned is that sometimes when we just chill the fuck out that wonderful things can happen.

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