"Update" NYC

The Promise of a New Day

We make promises every single day of our lives and the level of these promises have a rather broad range. These promises can range from starting new diets to promising to spend the rest of your life with someone. Then there are the times when the promises that we make end up breaking. Those are the promises that we remember the most…the ones that break. Divorce, falling off the wagon or not making a deadline for our jobs. Every single day we make a promise and every single day a promise gets broken. It’s a big concept that most of us take for granted (myself included) or not even think about. Which, in turn, got me thinking about the promise of each day that we are given. Is it wrong to take advantage of the day we are given or will we, in the end, be presented with negative experiences?

I certainly wasn’t wanting any negative experiences for my fifth date with the man from Jersey City last Tuesday as I got on the 33rd Street Path Train. In the dating world, it’s always hard to maintain that momentum when you first meet someone with all the other things you have going on in your life. Friends, family, work, gym and everything else can create an excuse for not being able to see a potential boyfriend/girlfriend as frequent as you should or want. It had been about a week since I last saw the guy and I wasn’t nervous to see him but you have to start over sometimes when you see them again. While you can text someone every day or call them on the phone each night; seeing them in the flesh is always a different experience. Most of the time it’s amazing when you physically get to see them again but there are those times when it can feel “off”.

It was hot last Tuesday in the city and there I was sweating along with all the other commuters on their way back to their lives in Jersey. Truth be told…I was ecstatic to see him again and couldn’t wait for our date. However, the commute was bothering me with all the pushy people and me carrying all my bags. When I finally arrived at the, Journal Square stop, I knew my emotions were “off.” It wasn’t anything he did, it wasn’t anything the patrons on the train did; it was all me. I needed to fix my attitude fast, for I just sent him a text that I arrived and to come pick me up. I promised myself right then and there that I can’t get pissy every single time I commute there or else it will ruin things between us. However, I couldn’t change my feelings fast enough before he drove up. I got in the car and didn’t kiss him right away and barely said anything. He was patient with me and then asked what was wrong and I told him that nothing wrong. That was the annoying part on my behalf was that there really was nothing wrong with me. It was my spoiled self not wanting to commute. I quickly changed my attitude once we hit a stop light and he kissed me.

We arrived at this cute little restaurant called, Park and Sixth. They have a Tuesday special where you can eat all the mussels you want for ten dollars and half priced wine. We were sold on the special and we ate the mussels and drank the wine. We became friends with a couple that sat next to us. The wine was flowing and we both were buzzed. He was sweet enough to pay the bill and I told him that I was going to get our next meal. After dinner, we walked a few blocks to get ice cream. It was fun just walking with him down a street I’ve never been to before and not having a care in the world. We came back to his place and went to bed rather quickly and peacefully.

The next morning, he dropped me off at the train station and I was back on my commute back to the city. On my ride back to the city, I made a promise to myself to not get too agitated with the commute. There will be days that it will be alright and there will be days when I will want to pull my hair out. It’s an easy enough promise to make to myself that will take patience on my part and hopefully a little understanding from him.

On Thursday, it was another warm evening in the city. This time, I was going to a friend’s birthday party in Chelsea at the bar, Elmo. I picked up a friend along the way and we commuted together to the party. I promised myself that I wasn’t going to spend a lot nor was I going to get drunk. That promise that I made to myself before the party ended up getting broken somewhere after the fourth cocktail. Most of all of my friends were there and everyone was having a good time. At some point, my friend and I left the party to quickly say hi to his boyfriend who was working at, Tipsy Parson. After we quickly said hello (and another cocktail), we took a cab ride home. I got home and passed out right away.

I woke up on Friday morning feeling o.k. but just tired. It’s the kind of tired where you know you got enough sleep but the alcohol didn’t let you fully get a proper rest. Still, I managed to pull myself together and get my ass to work. The day actually went rather well, for I was able to go on a two hour lunch and pull myself together. After lunch, a few work emails were sent and I was at the gym sweating it all out. After the gym, I only had a limited amount of time before the guy was picking me up in his new car to take me back with him to Jersey City.

He picked me up and off we went. It was nice seeing him, my mood was fine and the only thing I promised myself was to enjoy the limited time we had with each other since he had to work all weekend. He had to run a few errand, so I found myself in another unfamiliar territory…the mall. It’s funny as a teenager I lived in the mall and now it seems strange to shop in one. After that, we grabbed some wine and got take-out food. We came back to his place, where we had dinner, wine and watched the movie, Moonstruck. It was perfect and by the time we finished with our wine and meal, it was almost midnight. We had to be up early, so we called it an early night.

Bright and early on Saturday morning and he made me coffee, even gave me a quick haircut in his kitchen. I got ready, then he got ready and before I knew it, I was heading back to the city before 10 a.m. While it was a quick visit with him, I still enjoyed myself immensely.

I got off at the 14th Street stop and met up with friends at the store, Party City. We were picking up a few items before heading toward Coney Island. I haven’t been to Coney Island since, 1999. It is so far to get to but there was a special reason, the Mermaid Parade. All my time living here and I’ve never done this parade before. We filled our plastic cups up with vodka, boarded the Q train and made our journey to Brooklyn. It was crowded, met some interesting characters along the way and we all had a blast. We ate shitty food, drank and even managed to sit in the sand for a spell. After that, I went back to the city with one of my friends to get ready to host a small gathering of friends. I think we all were exhausted from all the commuting, the day time drinking and we called it a night somewhere around 1 a.m.

Yesterday, I woke up fully ready to do laundry and run errands but I realized that I hadn’t even turned my T. V. on in five days. I got some coffee and began to watch mindless T.V. before needing to get ready. I was attending my friends two year old son’s birthday in Brooklyn. I picked up my friend along the way, had a pre-cocktail and back on the subway we went. This commute was much shorter and we were in McCarren Park celebrating, eating delicious cake and of course…more drinking. We arrived around two and left a couple of hours later. There was talk of bringing the party to the city but we all realized we were exhausted and needed some rest. I got home, showered again and watched a movie before falling asleep on the earlier side.

Promises will be made and promises will be broken. Some promises are more significant than others but it’s the promise that we make to ourselves is what matters the most. The promise to be kind to a stranger, to do our best at our jobs, to love and not hate and the promise to know better. Each day that we wake up is the another day to not take for granted; it is after all…the promise of a new day.

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