"Update" NYC


Everyone remembers their first idol as children. It usually involved a famous sports player, someone on TV, a singer or sometimes your parents but for most of us, it is someone we don’t even know. Just that image we gravitated toward and wanted to BE. We did everything like our idols; we dressed like them, talked like them and bought everything that had their name or photo plastered on. But what happens when we become adults and our idols get older with us? I mean, do we still want to be like Michael Jordan or become a member of the New Kids on the Block? No. As we get older our idols change or for some, our idols remain the same and we just get older hoping that our idols remain immortal. For this queen, my idols have pretty much remained the same, we have Wonder Woman, all my romantic comedy gals and of course, my number one idol…Madonna but more on her later.

After putting to bed last week all my birthday festivities, I was fully embraced with my new age and ready to start a fresh week with wonderful things ahead. It is funny how there are certain weeks where you do not know which way it is going to turn out. But this past week, I knew that everything was going to be amazing and there was nothing that was going to change that direction of fulfillment.

Last Wednesday would be the start of wonderful experiences for me. After weeks of scheduling and rescheduling it was time for one of my oldest and best friends to get together for drinks. However, this time, our gathering would be for a very special reason. We were celebrating ten years of friendship at one of our favorite bars. The bar is called, Sly Fox, located on Second Avenue in the East Village. It is a DIVE and we considerate this place, our place, where no one would ever think to go or even sees us there. There is plastic on the seats and the bathrooms are connected to this Ukrainian restaurant. When we arrive, our bartender (who knows us all too well) gives us a free drink right away and we sit down and as my friend and I clink our glasses we begin to review the past ten years of our lives together. It was one of those moments where you really realize that you might even know this person better than some of your own family members. After a few too many cocktails, we say our goodbyes to each other and off into the subway I go to head back home to get rest for the next evening would be a big one for me.

Finally, the day has arrived. The day I had been waiting for, for at least a few months now. I didn’t want the day to come so quickly for it would be an indication that summer would be over but at least I had this event to look forward to. It would be attending a concert by my idol…Madonna at Yankee Stadium. This particular show I would be sitting by myself, which I don’t mind. I am not there to socialize, I am there to see my idol shimmy and shake on stage. I did, however, get to arrive to the show with friends so that was great. The weather as perfect, the people I were sitting by embraced me and took me under their wing and I simply warned them that the minute the lights go down I will be screaming, singing, dancing and acting like a jackass. They were warned and the minute the lights went down, I had my usual, out of body experience for the next hour and fifty minutes. As soon as the show was done, it was so hard to even find my way back to the subway but once I did, I felt better and wouldn’t you know, as my “Lucky Star” would have it. I ran into my friends who I went to the show with and we were able to compare notes and get back to civilization in one piece.

Friday. Another week at the office under my belt and I was ready to take on the weekend. I couldn’t even wait for it to get started. I was giddy, I felt like I was a teenager again. Once again, the city was blessed with one of those amazing days of weather; it was still warm and no humidity. That evening, I was to meet my friend from this past Wednesday for a champagne boat cruise. I have been dying to do this for a long time now and I was bummed when my other friends couldn’t go due to the event being sold out. As I met up with my friend on the corner of 23rd Street and 8th Avenue, we walked to the Chelsea Piers where the boat would be leaving from and we were already laughing our asses off before we even got there. Once we arrived at the pier, I noticed that the boat was not a regular boat but a sail boat. I had never been on a sail boat before and was slightly on the nervous side. I am not a big swimmer and all I wanted to do was immediately take advantage of the complimentary champagne. My friend tried to calm my nerves and said we would be just fine. She was right. The minute we all got on the sail boat and hit the Hudson River and I saw the view of the city…I was at ease and ready to sail. The clientele on the boat was different. Mainly couples, some party for a bunch of nurses and us. It was quiet at first but we decided to mix things up. We began flirting with the boat staff, getting free drinks and talking rather loudly about our favorite topic…sex. Finally, the people on the boat were taking notice and before we know it, we are part of the nurse’s party and another couple befriended us and began telling us their sexual escapades that would commence once we docked. Not very shocking, my friend and I became the loudest people on the boat and I was pretty drunk and knocked my champagne over and it got my ass all wet. We were all laughing at my clumsiness and before I knew it, we were back on dry land.

When we got on dry land, my friend suggested we go to the bar, The Frying Pan; I was shocked she even wanted to go there but I went along for the ride and as we walked in I saw another friend of mine randomly at the bar. It still didn’t occur to me in my drunken state to ask what he was doing there. As the three of us ordered our beers, the waitress noticed my voice was hoarse and asked if I was sick. I told her it was from screaming like a wild person at the Madonna concert the night before. She said she went too and gave me a free shot of tequila. Sigh. When I left the bar and turned around there in front of me, were all my friends with cupcakes and a tiara!!! I didn’t expect to see them there at all. They were there to celebrate my birthday because they were unable to hang out with me the prior week. It was so unexpected and amazing. I even got a cupcake shoved in my face but at least they didn’t ruin my tiara which would stay on my head for the remainder of the night. After we finished our beers there, we all decided to hit up the bar, Barracuda, I must have done a few more shots of tequila and continued with the beers but by this point I was feeling pretty darn good. Once we ended our time at that bar, only a few friends were remaining and thought it would be a good idea to go to the trashy bar, Rawhide, for a game of pool. I could barely feel my legs but decided to go anyway. As I watched my friends play pool, I just felt that feeling of being so lucky to have such crazy fools in my life. After that feeling left me, they put my drunken ass in a cab and I went home to pass out.

When I woke up the next morning and turned on the TV, there were reports of a tornado that touched down in Queens. This next part makes me very selfish but after hearing that no one was hurt, all I could think about was that I hope Madonna’s concert would not be canceled. All day long, the reports kept changing on the weather and I was just waiting for that email saying that the show was canceled and I would be getting a refund. Words I did not want to read. By early that evening, we all met at the country western gay bar, Flaming Saddles, had a drink and jumped on the D train to head over to Yankee Stadium. All of us were a bunch of giddy queens, along with the other 40,000 queens that night. The rain wasn’t really letting up but thankfully a friend suggested we all get ponchos from this street vendor. That was the best five dollars we would spend all night. They protected us as we waited for my idol to come down and greet us. We had killer seats and it was quite hilarious because all my friends know how I feel about Madonna but this was our first concert of hers where we were all seated together so I was in mid sentence when the lights went down and I just lost my shit once again. Everyone was dying from laughter and for the next two hours, we danced, we sang and screamed till I pretty much had no voice left. This show was better than Thursday’s. I don’t know if it was the energy, her performance, the rain or the fact that I was surrounded by my friends but I was on a high for several hours afterwards. Our goal was to go to the bar, Townhouse, afterwards but once we got there they told me I couldn’t come in because I was wearing a sleeveless shirt and so we tried the bar across the street and that was a bust. We go to the Hells Kitchen area and go to, Therapy, and literally all have one drink. By the time we picked a destination and how late it already was, we were all exhausted. We all hugged goodbye and went our separate ways. I was grateful for many reasons that night. My idol didn’t cancel her show, I was with my friends and I wasn’t going to be bed drunk.

Yesterday I woke up feeling great. I got my laundry done and even managed to squeeze in a four mile run. However, after I showered and was ready to run some errands in the city, I was nervous almost to the point of anxiety.  You see, I would be having brunch with Mr. B. and I wasn’t nervous because of having brunch with him but this time there would be another guest seated at the table. His son. I love children and I can’t wait to have some of my own but this as a ten year old boy. The only thing I have in common with a ten year old boy was that I used to be one but I highly doubt this kid is running around acting like Wonder Woman like I was at ten years old. I was probably more fearful to meet the kid than any date I had ever been on in my career. This was definitely a first for me but I decided that if I wanted the brunch to go over well, I would have to show no fear. Kids are like animals in the wild. If you show fear…you are dead. If you act like nothing scares you than you will be just fine. So, when I arrived at Spice in Chelsea, I was ready for anything that came my way.

As brunch began, I asked the boy questions about school, sports and any topic that I could think of. He answered them not only in a polite manner but with kindness. This kid had manners and I believe I was being well received. Whew. During the brunch, Mr. B. and I were also able to talk and catch up once the boy had an iPhone to play with. It was rather cute actually because he didn’t even let his father see how far he was getting in his game but he was showing me. By the end of the meal, the boy was eating off my plate and I felt at ease. After brunch, he needed to go basketball shoe shopping. Shoe shopping? This is where I come into play. This is what I do best. So, I took them to a few places that I knew sold kid shoes. Turns out, this kid only a half size smaller in shoe size than I am and he is only 10!!! After the shoe shopping, I could tell all he wanted to do was go shoot hoops and I also knew that Mr. B. needed to get him home in order to be ready for school the next day. We said our goodbyes and I told him how nice it was to meet him and he said it was nice meeting me as well. After we parted ways, I thought how nice of an afternoon that was. Yes. I was spent but that was probably a combination of nerves, all my activity from the weekend and being around someone with more energy than me. A few hours later, I received a text from Mr. B. thanking me for hanging out with him and his son and that next time we will have some one on one time. I told him that there was no need to thank me for I had a great time and that I was looking forward to the next time we would be hanging out.

Idols. Maybe as adults we no longer have idols but we just become fans of certain things. Idols might be designed for the younger generation where they have a clean slate to worship the people they look up to. As adults we know that even our idols make mistakes but as kids we think they are perfect. That is a great feeling to have, to think that someone is immortal, pure and can do no wrong. I was lucky enough to even see how Mr. B.’s son idolizes his dad. This got me thinking that maybe as adults we don’t idolize a celebrity or some famous baseball player but rather do our best to become a person that someone idolizes.  By making sure that our actions and setting positive examples for others to witness might cause them to want to do better things for the world themselves. We might make mistakes along the way on this journey but it is how we correct and learn from them in what makes us all potential future idols.

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