"Update" NYC

Time After Time

Time. A word that can create chaos/happiness/stress/ bliss and this word, “Time,” actually runs our lives. If you think about it…we base our entire lives on “Time.” Are we running late for work? When does the movie start? We have dating for so long and when will he propose? Or even something as simple as it is noon and our bodies are telling us it is “Time” for lunch. With all these daily occurrences in our lives, I couldn’t help but wonder if “Time” is our friend or enemy?

After my trip to the country last weekend, I was ready to get back in the action of the city life and also work off that fried Oreo cookie I had at the county fair. That Monday, I ended up working and then getting a last minute invite for drinks with a friend, Mr. B., and so we agreed to meet at Flaming Saddles and catch each other up. After a few beers at Flaming, we decided to go to the bar, Therapy, and there I went from beers to vodka…usually it is the other way around but there you have it. After a few rather strong cocktails, I knew it was time to head home and so Mr. B. walked me home and we said our goodbye. It was a nice way to start the week off.

By the time Wednesday rolled around, it was time for a date with Mr. Architect. I decided in an effort to save money and relax, that it would be best to have him come to my apartment for an Italian evening. This evening would consist of watching one of my favorite movies, Moonstruck, and ordering pizza. Not only was the pizza delicious but Mr. Architect enjoyed the film. A very nice and relaxing evening for a midweek date.

The next day, we would all be attending my friends’ 40th birthday party. He had a nice soiree set up on the top of the bar, The Park, and it was very nice to see him, the crew and even meeting his parents. Mr. Architect joined us for the evening and it was just pleasant, a few cocktails, snacks and nothing crazy. I think we all consciously decided not to get drunk that night for we knew we would be having a crazy weekend ahead of us. That night also marked the last night I would be seeing Mr. Architect for awhile. You see, he was going on vacation with friends of his to Vermont for a week and by the time he would be coming back from his vacation; I would be going away to Fire Island for four days. So basically, we would be missing each other by a few days. The next morning, I wished Mr. Architect a great trip and to get to his destination safely and I was off to work. On my way to work that morning, I got to thinking about “Time,” and how it can change how a person views things. We had just passed the three month mark in our dating and I still wasn’t sure what or where we were headed. Not that I wanted or needed things to head to a certain place but it just had been three months and I still am ambivalent to the entire situation. Maybe “Time” was playing tricks on me.

Friday rolled around, I was exhausted from the previous weekend and just all that I managed to cram into the week. I was ready to go home after work, do some laundry, watch some episodes of, The Golden Girls, and call it a night. Which is pretty much what I did, till a friend called that lived in my area and asked to come by to watch some bad TV and on my way to my friends’ apartment, I just happened to run into Mr. B. randomly and a friend of his on their way to a bar. I was tempted but luckily my heinous outfit that consisted of track shorts, t-shirt and a baseball cap kept me from crashing their party and regretting my choices the next morning.

When I woke on Saturday, not hungover, I knew I had made the right decision by staying in. I managed to squeeze in a killer workout and was feeling alive. That day for brunch, I would be meeting a friend of mine who lives in San Francisco and was in town for a wedding at, Elmo. I arrived early and he was running late since he was staying with a friend in Jersey City and the commute into the city was not the best that day. I decided to take that time to start having a much needed Blood Orange Cosmopolitan…damn she tasted good. As I was sitting there waiting for him to arrive, a guy sitting next to me having a beer, started chatting me up. He asked what I did and I told him about my writing and before I knew it, he said, he was familiar with this blog and loved how my stories are told. He shook my hand, finished his beer and wished me luck with the career. Finally, my friend arrives and we begin our brunch and updating each other on our lives, etc. Since he was in town for a wedding, he needed help picking out the gift and card. So I helped him pick out some nice and classy items for the couple-to-be. After that, we said our goodbyes and I went to, Merchants, over on Seventh Avenue, to meet my girlfriend whom I haven’t seen in months to give her the lowdown on my dating life, give her a pep talk on her upcoming first date with a new guy and to try and sober up from brunch. Once we were all caught up and I began to think clearly, we hugged goodbye and back to Hells Kitchen I went in order to get ready for the evening.

That night, some friends’ of mine and I were going to see the comedian, Anjelah Johnson, perform at Gotham’s Comedy Club. If you don’t know who this chick is…please look her up. But before we were to go see the show, we decided to meet for an earlier dinner and drinks at, Spice. Drinks were served and there we all began to get all caught up. As we sat there, I again, began to think of “Time” and how long I have known these people sitting with me at the table. We have seen each other grow-up, change jobs, lose jobs, lose lovers and gain all these life experiences. Still, through all this, we have maintained a great relationship with each other. That is why we refer to each other as “family” rather than “friends.” We are all more than that to each other and therefore, since we consider ourselves “family”, that also gives everyone the right to voice their opinions, support and judge at times. Usually, I am the one giving the dating advice but this time the tables were turned. One particular friend pointed out my writing and this blog in particular and said that this blog is my life and stories and it is best to be honest for those that read and he couldn’t be more right. I took those words he said to me to heart. I knew that creating this blog would also create a bigger audience; it would also run the risk or hurting people or boosting them up. Those that come into this world must enter at their own risk.

Once dinner was done, we all walked around the corner to the comedy show; where it also turned out that my friend from San Francisco and a few of his friends’ joined us for the show. After the show, we all parted ways and the friends’ I had dinner with ended up going with me to the bar, Barracuda, for those additional drinks that we probably didn’t need. We all wanted an early night because the next day we had a brunch and a friend of mine had work to do but after a few drinks there which led to going to the bar, Boxers, which led to shots of tequila and before I know it…we are all in a cab heading to the east side to, Urge Bar. By the time we arrived at that bar, I knew we were all goners. We got another round of shots, beers and the go-go boys that you have no idea where they had been before their shifts had started. I don’t know exactly what time we all said goodbye to each other but I do know that when I looked at the clock before I passed out; it was almost 4 am. So much for an early night!

Only having had a few hours of sleep and plans that I did not want to cancel; I was going to be meeting a friend of mine’s new born son. She had arranged for a few of us all to meet in Brooklyn at a restaurant called, Cubana Social. The food was great but the service…not so much. Meeting this baby was amazing, being only 7 weeks old, he was just so tiny and awesome. When I held him in my arms, if I had ovaries, they would have been jumping all over the place. It was a great bonding time and I look forward to babysitting him in the future. After brunch, we all walked over to the Brooklyn Brewery, I chose not to drink because I was till hungover from the night before and I was meeting, Mr. B., for a movie later on. I said my goodbyes to the crew and headed back to the city.

As I got the Sunshine Landmark movie theatre, I was excited to see this movie with Mr. B., he is still somewhat new to the gang and so it would be a great chance to get to know him. We watched the trailers and commented on what looked good or not and then the movie started. We ended up seeing this movie called, Celeste and Jessie Forever, and it was better than I thought. After the movie, my friend, who was working at the Ace Hotel, told me to stop by with Mr. B. at the John Dory for some cocktails. I had no idea that when we got there, that the same people I was having brunch with hours prior, would also be there. It was great and we all had a few drinks but my body was still rejecting the booze and my body was telling me to go home and get rest. So after a few beers, we all parted ways and I took my ass home and went straight to bed.

While Mr. Architect has been gone on vacation, I found myself forgetting what it was like before I met him. Those single things you do on your own “Time”; like staying out all night with your friends, going to movies that the other person might not want to see or letting yourself look like shit in the privacy of your own apartment. Like any relationship, having your own “Time” to do your own things are extremely important and gives you that sense of independence while also balancing out your dating life.

Time. It is a funny thing. We can use “Time” to our advantage like submitting a deadline early or kicking ass in marathon and leaving everyone in your dust. And then there is the negative side to “Time”, like procrastinating on watering that plant and you find it dead on the window seal or even something far more dramatic by not taking the “Time” to fix a wrong that you might have done to someone. Regardless of how we use this “Time” that we are given on this earth, the most important thing in life is to take the “Time” for yourself so that you can become the person you brought on this earth to be.




  1. Allen

    do you remember the jewish guy that opened up for anjellah johnson’s show? he was hilarious ahah

  2. It’s in fact very difficult in this full oof activity life to listen news on TV,
    thus I simply use the web for that reason, and obtain the newest information.

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