"Update" NYC

It’s A Mad Mad Men World

A couple of Friday’s ago a few of us were invited to a friend of mine’s apartment for a nice seafood dinner. As the winter months begin to settle in New York we tend to find ourselves enjoying more dinner parties and game nights in someone’s home rather than bar hopping or checking out what the latest restaurant is.

So as we all arrive at my friends’ fabulous new Chelsea apartment, the host begins to tell us of this amazing fundraiser that he is apart of. It is for, Freedom To Get Married, and while gay man can now marry in the state of New York, there are still 44 more states to go. It will also have somewhat of a Valentine’s Day feel, you can either bring your partner or you have the potential to meet your future husband. It is being held on February 16th from 5-9pm at the newest reopening of the bar, XL, at 512 West 42nd Street. Please help a good cause out by either buying a ticket, buying someone else a ticket or if you are single, buy yourself the damn ticket; you never know whom you are going to meet:


As I observed the guest list at the dinner party that night, it occurred to me that there are only a few of us left in the crew that are single. Almost everyone one of my friends, both gay and straight; are in relationships. And not just your run of the mill, month long relationships, they have all been together for a while. It is great actually to see, they are committed and get this…they are all happy. It is rare that a friend of mine pulls me aside and is bitching about their partner; so to be able to witness a friend’s joy is something that I am grateful to be a part of.

As the topic of marriage equality and the details of the benefit continued, I began to think if I could even afford to attend this event. One of my goals this year, like so many out there, it so pay off some of by debt and in doing so, something like benefits, isn’t really in one’s budget. I committed in my mind right than and there, that I was going to attend my friend’s fundraiser one way or the other. One of my friends at the party said he would get me a ticket since he is unable to attend but wanted to support the host of the dinner party and the cause itself. I told him that it wasn’t necessary and I would get my ticket one way or the other. Even if that meant not shopping for a little bit, I knew that attending this fundraiser was far more important to me and I also want to constantly support my friends good efforts.

A few days later, after a rather hectic day at work, I was to have dinner with another friend of mine in Hells Kitchen at, Arriba Arriba, a place that I like to go to every so often to have one of those Mama Margaritas, after having one of those babies; you will be reaching for the nearest sombrero and singing with a mariachi band. As my friend and I began to update each other, him telling me about how going back to school is a whole new experience for him and me telling him that no dates or sex has happened for me in quite awhile. Once the margaritas kicked in, that is when he began to lecture me about it being high time that I get back on the saddle again and get laid. All of my friends know me as someone that is not very forward with sex or promiscuous, even after several cocktails. His goal for me as we said our goodbyes was to get laid this weekend. I told him I would think about it, and truth be told, I had been thinking about how long it had been, and as far as timelines go, let’s just say that 2012 has been a slow start so far.

Ending a rather long and frustrating week at work, I was very happy to see Friday arrive. I was also rather excited for it was movie night for us. Movie night for us usually involves me sending a mass email out to everyone earlier that week for a movie I know we are all dying to see. We all buy our tickets and we usually take up the entire row at a movie theatre. It gives me great joy to look around and see all my friends take over a movie theatre in Manhattan. This week’s movie selection was the new Madonna movie, W.E., critics didn’t care for it but we certainly did and afterwards we decided to celebrate the only real way we know how…we drank. After crashing someone’s birthday party whom I had no idea who the person was, a few of us decided to leave and head over to the West Village.

A Friday night at the bar, The Monster, is something that is usually not in our regular scheduled programs but there we were. The minute I walked in, I was given a shot of tequila and a beer. Sigh. I got an instant high and was ready to be out and about for the rest of the night. After our visit to, The Monster, we decided to head over to a place that I used to work at briefly and that is the ever popular, Kingswood. As we walked in, the bartenders immediately recognized us, and before we even took our coats off; there were beers put in front of us with a smile from the always-sexy staff. After a few more beers and a shot of Jameson, I realized that maybe it was time we all head home. So we wrapped it up, said our goodbyes and off into a cab I went. I left in the cab with a smile on my face feeling that this weekend was going to be a good one or the smile on my face could have been the fact that I have had several cocktails. Either way…I was happy damn it.

Woke up on Saturday actually not hung over at all, so with that lucky feeling, I immediately began the daily rituals. That entails doing the laundry, Pilates and of course…shopping. I knew that I needed to do another article for this blog, so I took my laptop and went to my normal hangout to do my writing. I always go to the Starbucks on 9th Ave and 59th Street. I go there because it is actually a Starbucks where even in the winter months; you can get a seat. As I got settled in with my soy mocha and turning the on button to the computer, I couldn’t help but think about the goal that my friend had set out for me for the weekend. So I began to take in my surroundings and there I saw the usual crowd. It consisted of women with their shopping bags discussing their purchases of the day, the cute couple in the corner holding hands and me…sitting with my mocha and laptop.

As I began to write this very article, a very handsome man walked in. He reminded me of the actor, Jon Hamm, but of course was not him. A person that I felt was clearly out of my league and I didn’t even know if he was gay or not. I gave him a half smile and went back to writing. Moments later I feel the presence of someone standing by me. I look to my left and there he was…Mr. Mad Men, Jon Hamm.

He smiled one of those smiles that honestly can take your breath away. He opened with, “What are you doing?” and I replied with “Just writing.” I felt like I couldn’t really look at him directly for I feared that I would say something utterly lame and he would take his coffee and run. It wasn’t very long before he asked, “Would you like to get out of here?” And I asked where he actually wanted to go seeing that we were already in a coffee shop and it was six o’clock in the afternoon. He said he has some amazing wine at his apartment on the Upper East Side. Now is one of those moments where I should have put the red light on and sent Mr. Mad Men on his merry way. But after thinking how I am not much of a risk taker when it comes to these scenarios and my friends “goal” running in the back of my mind. I told him, “Sure. Let’s get out of here. But I don’t feel comfortable traveling with my laptop and I need to drop it off first.” He hailed a cab and he waited in the car with the meter running while I was upstairs dropping off the laptop and of course…freshening up.

I got back in the cab and there I realized what he meant by living on the Upper East Side. As we passed the 60’s, the 70’s and even the 80’s, we finally reached 91st and Third Ave. There in a lush building, we rode the elevator up to his apartment. My heart was beating so loudly and my hands were incredibly clammy. In my head, I thought of the only two scenarios that could happen here:

  1. I am going to get murdered and not one person knows where the hell I am


  1. We are going to have a great time, fall in love and we can tell everyone we fell for each other over a Grande Soy Mocha and a Venti Hot Coffee

As Mr. Mad Men opened a bottle of wine and he put on some music, I began to look around the living room and see how “grown-up” this apartment is. It made me feel like I was barely living but once the wine glass was put in my hand, I took a rather big sip. You know…to calm my nerves. After a few moments of more polite conversation that is when he made his move. He leaned in and kissed me. After making out for several minutes in his living room he gave me the ego booster of saying, “You are hands down one of the best kissers I have ever came across.” I knew that I was in for a fun ride. Or so I thought.

He suggested we go back to his bedroom. I told him right off the bat that just because we are going to the bedroom does not mean we are going to be having sex. Two seconds later…clothes were on the floor. As we continued to make-out, I got distracted. I looked around and saw a million picture frames, all different sizes and styles. The one thing that was consistent with all these frames was the same people in all the photos. It was Mr. Mad Men, a rather beautiful woman and a young boy.

All of the sudden, without any real notice, Mr. Mad Men was done and I was having a look on my face as if I just saw a train coming at me at lightning speed. He got up went to the bathroom and that is where I knew it was my time to ask the inevitable question. I asked the ever-suave Mr. Mad Men, who the hell these people were in all of the photos. He came back from the bathroom and said, “That is the thing. I am married and that is my son. And you should get going because while I am in the process of getting a divorce. My son is on his way back in a few minutes so I need you to get dressed and leave before anyone sees you.”

I didn’t know that as someone who loves to talk and is all about the words that I could be left speechless but there I was with nothing to say. I quickly grabbed my clothes, got dressed and before I knew it, I was hitting the number one button to go down to the first floor of the building. As I walked out of the building I couldn’t help but wonder as every kid passed me by if that kid was his. After feeling like shit for a few blocks, I forced myself to snap out of it. Yes, what I did was on the riskier side of things and yes I felt almost guilty of my actions. But than I thought to myself that I didn’t know anything about his current state of living before going home with him and that his situation is his issue and not mine.

After walking a few more blocks, the night was young, the air was crisp and instead of taking the subway, I walked. I walked all the way from the east side to the west side, right where I belong. Once I turned the key into my apartment I knew that I didn’t even want to venture back outside into the world. So I forced myself to stay inside get a proper rest and act like the day never happened.

As Sunday started I vowed that I would no longer go home with some random strangers. However, I was excited to start the day, excited to see my friends, excited to see the Superbowl and excited to see Madonna perform the Halftime show. As I left the Superbowl party and the streets were filled with car horns going off, people celebrating in the streets it was one of those moments where you smile and think to yourself how lucky you are to live in this amazing city and be a New Yorker.

As the new week begins, I know it be all about my preparation for the fundraiser next week, and that entails extra maintenance on the old body and of course shopping for a new outfit. For any of you that want to be apart of this great cause, I encourage you all to get a ticket and get ready to have an amazing time: www.freedomtomarry.org/get-engaged

I predict this event will have a wonderful turn out and again; you never whom you will meet…just stay away from anyone that resembles the actor, Jon Hamm.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: